CTS Writes

VAGINA DENTATA

Why, when I was a young mam’selle,
I weren’t no normal damsel!
I found my downstairs lacked a certain appeal,
I would have to brush twice after every meal.
I’m a sensitive soul, but my boyfriend was mean,
When instead of KY he applied Listerine…
And oh, the shame!
What this issue became!
But he got a real shock,
When it bit off his…
(Sorry, not in front of the kids!)

Vagina Dentata!
What a terrible phrase
Vagina Dentata!
It’s a frightful malaise
It means no coitus
For the rest of my days
It’s not problem-free.
No bonks for me!
Vagina Dentata!

Vagina Dentata!
Trapped in the oral phase
Vagina Dentata!
Woe betide it decays!
When I try flossing,
It can take me three days.
Cos I got dentistry,
Gynaecologically,
Vagina Dentata!